FROM BUST: Dinner at the Palin’s House, Part II
by Lisa on Aug.15, 2010, under zeitgeist
In this second installment of imagined scenarios the
re is no actual food on the table. The Madame of the house has called an emergency meeting.
“He is doing WHAT? Running for my old job as mayor of Wasilla? On a reality TV show?” Sarah fumes. “How could you not know this? Did he not mention it while you were together?”
“Mom, gaah. D’uh,” Bristol starts with an eye roll. “You know we weren’t together together. That was just for the paycheck from People. I can’t live on what I make at that medical center. The whole thing was your idea. I bet he even got the idea from the fact that you’re doing that Alaska show for Discovery.”
The corners of Sarah’s mouth turn up. She knows the People photo shoot wasn’t her idea at all, but she’s not about to set that record straight. Not now. There’s work to be done. “Todd, get the Attorney General on the phone. We’re going to put a stop to this before it gets started.”
“But honey, what am I supposed to tell him?” Todd asks. “There isn’t really any…”
“Oh shut up, Todd. I don’t know why I even asked you to come to this meeting.”
Janelle Monae’s “Tightrope” gets my vote for song of the summer. Take THAT Katy Perry.
by Lisa on Aug.10, 2010, under zeitgeist
I admit to stealing this idea (thank you, Eric), but it’s so dead on I had to post. Janelle Monae’s “Tightrope” may have gotten 23 million fewer hits on YouTube than Katy Perry’s “California Girls,” but no CGI gummy bears were injured in the making of this video. I think it makes a way better Song of the Summer. What do you think?
[video: 425x344]
Writing a book? Let the self-deprecation begin! (from BUST)
by Lisa on Aug.08, 2010, under zeitgeist
If you’re writing a book, try and make friends with a quasi-famous person to make fun of you when it comes time to promote that sucker, because apparently this trend is still cresting that wave. The tendency first came to my attention l
ast May at the Mobys, an awards show concocted by the industry to bring attention to the latest craze in publishing–book trailers, short films meant to market works to wider audiences (like movie trailers, but for books). In John Wray’s Lowboy, Zach Galifianakis plays an incoherent (if hilarious) version of the author. [video:
425x344]
Then there was the best foreign film trailer for Etcetera and Otherwise, aptly described by the New York Times as “a violently comic assault on Canadian literary lions done in a style that brings Margaret Atwood into a kind of north-of-the-border “South Park.””
[video:
425x344]
But what really cemented this pattern for me was seeing James Franco promote Gary Shteyngart’s upcoming Super Sad True Love Story, in which the author plays himself as an illiterate and James Franco…well I’m not sure what he was doing in there except getting more attention for the book.
[video:
425x344]
The most beautiful effort on awards night this beauty from New Zealand, but it left me unable to recall the author, subject or book title (Maurice Gee’s Going West). [video:
425x344]
On the other hand, the trailer that’s stuck with me the longest, because it had a plot and looked like a TV show, was soundly criticized. [video:
425x344]
So what does this mean for book marketing? Of all these books the one I’m most likely to read is Shteyngart’s, and it’s not because of the trailer, except that I heard about it faster than I would have otherwise. And yeah, I’m just as susceptible to the charms of being made to feel hip when in fact, I am the kind of person who goes to a book award show without any actual reason for being there. So yeah, count me as hoping it works.
From the Annals of Stupid–India Moves to Patent Yoga
by Lisa on Jun.11, 2010, under spiritual, yoga, zeitgeist
An Indian government body is preparing patents for some 900 yoga postures. That’s pretty bad considering that yoga is not actually about the poses (that is a distinctly Western adaptation) and yet, the disingenuous posturing these officials are adopting actually makes it worse.
“It’s like soccer an
d Britain,” Suneel Singh–identified as a leading Indian yogi–told the Guardian. “You have given it to the world which is wonderful and generous. But imagine that people started saying they had invented the sport. That would be annoying.”
Maybe he should try some pranayama? Meditate on that? Seriously, annoyed as a rationale?
In that same article we are reassured by a Dr VK Gupta, one of the movement’s main proponents, that “there is no intention to stop people practising yoga but nobody should misappropriate yoga and start charging franchise money.” That is spit-take worthy. Has he seen what they charge at the Astanga Yoga Institute in Mysore? Or he’s okay with that because it’s in India? What about the Western dude who popularized the shala? Isn’t he entitled to a kickback? Is this about kickback? I just don’t get it. “Our job is to provide the evidence and let others decide,” is what he says, but decide what?
Speaking to the Hindustan Times, Gupta was more direct: “Video recordings of the asanas are also being made and recorded to prevent them from being stolen.”
OK, so what if the alignment is different in their Triangle than mine? If you’re a regular practitioner you know, yes, those micro-adjustments make a huge difference. And who exactly are we stealing from? This implies that we owe recompense. If anything, this idiotic move encourages people to do yoga and call it something else.
FROM BUST: Anti-Flibanserin: Dumbest Petition Ever
by Lisa on Jun.06, 2010, under love, sex, zeitgeist
Some well-meaning but uptight folks over at change.org started a petition to ban the use of Flibanserin as a female sexual enhancement drug, stating that a low sex drive in women is not a disease. So, does the fact that there’s a male sexual enhancement drug on the market mean that low sex drive in men is a disease? Or is their thinking that since Viagara works on bloodflow, whereas Flibanserin stimulates serotonin production, it’s only a matter of time before this treatment modality puts women in the mental health ghetto? C’mon.
The drug did begin life as an anti-depressant, though apparently it didn’t work very well. I’d suggest this makes the drug emphatically not aimed at treating mental health issues. More to the point, why is this drug is being marketed exclusively to women? Men suffer from this type of sexual funk just like the ladies. Or should I have dumped that guy as soon as I found out he had a cat named Misery? But this is not some exclusively heterosexual issue.
Look, if you’re not into having sex as often as your partner, but you don’t want your partner having sex with someone else, why not? The side effects (contrary to what the petition states) are low to nonexistent. What is the downside? Sometimes, yes, we have to act our way into different thinking. It’s called behavior modification. Understanding why you don’t want to have sex–I’m going out on a limb here–not all that useful. Nobody cares! I guess if you don’t want to try something even as passive as popping a pill to put a little pizazz into your sex life, well, maybe you oughta cut that fish loose.
Having said all this I feel I must confess, part of me wishes there was a reverse pill. I’m at that age where I have the libido of a teenage boy and–despite advantages I may have accrued–all the frustration to go along with it. Erg. Saltpeter, anyone? That work?
Furiously sexy with Christian Audigier and/or Ed Hardy
by Lisa on May.26, 2010, under sex, zeitgeist
Wow. Thank you, over at the Gloss, for finding this gem of a new product–the Christian Audigier branded condom. Or should I say, cõndõm. Well, only if you have the bragging rights to the Bõnd model. We all knew the Ed Hardy brand had jumped the shark when it started showing up in–irony of ironies for products named after a tattoo collector–tattoos of the label. But this is a whole new level of brand extension. Who are they actually targeting with this thing? And why is it Christian Audigier condoms and Ed Hardy lubricants? Who made the call in that brainstorming session? Was it the same guy who chose the first line of the web copy–All of our products are made in Malaysia. What?!? Why don’t I have one right now? But my favorite line? GET FURIOUSLY SEXY. In all caps. In case you weren’t angry enough when you started fucking.
In other news, I’m starting a new 6am yoga class next week and freaking out. Hence the early morning post…
(Little) Girls Just Wanna Have Fun
by Lisa on May.18, 2010, under zeitgeist
Yes, I’m kind of a prude when it comes to entertainment and sexuality. For instance I’m horrified by the Disneyfication of the upcoming Ramona movie. And pageant kids and their moms are worse than clowns and mimes on my nightmare scale. But the furor over the clip of these girls dancing passed me by.
I wanted to look on in shock, but they’re so talented that instead I started to wonder if I could bill myself as a talent agent and contact a couple of them. Surely they are on their way to stardom. At least I hope. They are totally into the act, mouthing the words and making faces. Playing along. Awesomeness. So I was ready to let this one pass without comment.
But thanks to the dudes at The Skorpion Show, I found a video along these lines that IS totally cringe-worthy.
In this clip, a boy is exhorted by the adults looking on to grab onto this young girls hips as she is encouraged to really grind into him. Now THAT’S sexualizing children in a totally inappropriate way. Just look at the way she breaks out into a sheen of sweat. Viewer discretion is advised…
Paris is Burning (Still)
by Lisa on Apr.21, 2010, under sex, zeitgeist
“Your son is a woman!” cried a strange voice at me from my friend’s answering machine. “Oh that’s from Paris is Burning,” my friend explained later. “You never saw that?” The rising inflection in his voice told me I should. A gay black man who grew up in the deep South, Willy was celebrating the 20th anniversary of the film that taught him he could make his own community. About time I saw this thing.
The film documents the houses that poor gay men flocked to as far back as the 1960s, according to one of its interviewees, Dorian Corey. The houses provided shelter to some, but more importantly held balls that epitomized a certain style. (Madonna’s “Vogue,” is taken from the ball culture.) Clips from the balls are interspersed with commentary from “children” (hopeful up and coming ball talent) and “legends” (established acts). According to the legendary Corey, in the early days the balls were all about emulating the Las Vegas showgirl style, but had lately become all about labels. This was shot in 1987 and 1989, and I daresay that now, most of these guys wouldn’t make it through a reality makeover show without some major changes. And this is one of the film’s finer points–celebrating “the best” in fashion is an ephemeral pursuit. Yet with his wizened reminiscences (“as you get older… you think you’ve left a mark on the world if you just get through it…”) Corey makes it meta.
“They’re all dead now,” Willy tells me, after I’ve watched it. “AIDS or just getting beat up.”
And this reminds me to blog about it. We are all, after all, ephemeral. All communities are fragile, worth cherishing, and celebrating.
Springtime in paradise…
by Lisa on Mar.28, 2010, under zeitgeist
Only in New York…
Won’t you be my (virtual) neighbor?
